It’s part of her job now as the new co-host of a podcast that rewatches and analyzes every episode of The Hills, but Audrina Patridge is struggling with the role, mainly because watching herself has proven cringeworthy. Her words.

The 37-year-old reality TV star makes the revelation in an interview with ET’s Denny Directo while discussing her new memoir, Choices: To the Hills and Back Again, which will be released on July 26. Patridge writes in her book that in watching the first few episodes of the MTV series that aired for six seasons from 2006 to 2010 that she hardly recognized herself.

Now, as part of the trio that includes Brody Jenner and Frankie Delgado dissecting each episode for the Was It Real? The Hills Rewatch podcast, Patridge says rewatching the episodes now has been laboring.

“Yes, I am just finishing season 1 and it’s a little cringey, I’m not going to lie,” Patridge admits to ET. “But I watch it and I see this young 19-year-old that has no idea what she’s in for and the relationships she is about to go through and what she’s about to experience in her life, but with the public picking her apart.”

Patridge rose to face with the MTV series, but she admits being naive got the best of her. 

“I was just so naive and young and innocent,” she explains, “but so trusting.”

The mother of one says she came from a peaceful home, so it was quite the shock to experience the drama-filled episodes on The Hills.

“It was kind of a slap. It was like, ‘Whoa, what did I sign up for?'” she says. “All the cattiness and all the fights and being on a reality show, it can be confrontational. You have to be opinionated. You can’t hold back, otherwise it’s boring.”

MTV would ultimately revive The Hills with a reboot dubbed The Hills: New Beginnings. But the show didn’t last, and it was canceled after two seasons. Patridge reveals that the pandemic really threw the show’s rhythm off its game.

“Well, COVID,” she says. “We had so many setbacks. “And when we started filming, you know, everything was flowing. We were all in on the storylines and the drama and just ready to give our everything to make it a great show. And then COVID happened. And then when we started filming eight or nine months later, we were all in different places when we did film.”

But MTV’s not done with reviving The Hills. According to Deadline, MTV’s gearing up to produce The Hills: Next Gen (working title), which will feature a brand-new twentysomething cast. And Patridge has strong feelings about it.

“At first, I felt like it was kind of a slap in the face because we didn’t even know that was happening,” she explains. “We found out when it was announced. But at the same time, we’re all in a different place right now and I feel like we’ve all kind of dated each other and had our drama, so there’s only so much we can do. Now, with the new cast, I feel like they’re all gonna be these young, you know, 20-year-olds that are gonna make great TV.”